Habits. Purpose. Happiness. Three simple words, three fundamental elements of our existence. We all want to be happy, and many of us also have a burning desire to clearly define our purpose. Thankfully, in today’s world, there is no shortage of habit frameworks that seek to help you to achieve both.
So why do so many of us still struggle to lead a life rich in fulfillment?
Undoubtedly, the term ‘habit’ has become something of a buzz word in recent years, but at its core it refers to a regular practice that is difficult for one to give up. To me, ‘purpose’ is the philosophical cousin of habit, as when we combine multiple habits, we aim to elevate ourselves to a higher sense of purpose and productivity in our daily lives. Then comes ‘happiness’, the ultimate goal that we collectively strive for. In theory, with a strong foundation of habits, we strengthen our sense of purpose, and in doing so should discover a greater sense of happiness.
That, at least, is the most obvious assumption of the intertwined relationship between habits, purpose, and happiness. But in practice, achieving each can be incredibly difficult.
Unhappy?
In this increasingly strange world in which we live, habits, purpose, and happiness are not easily attainable. On paper, we are more comfortable than ever before. We lead livelihoods that generations before us would view as unfathomable, yet in 2024 just 32% of people in the UK reported ‘very high’ levels of happiness. In the US, just 44% of respondents to Gallup’s annual Mood of the Nation said that they were very satisfied with their lives. And in Australia, NCLS Research found that only 11% of the country were ‘very happy.’
Three English-speaking nations, spread across three continents, each with developed economies, yet each struggle to achieve consistently high levels of happiness.
With these statistics in mind, the ‘self-help’ craze of the past five years suddenly makes a lot more sense.
I certainly have enjoyed my fare share of self-help books. In my second year at University, I suffered something of a shock to the system after a year spent living the ‘obligatory’ student lifestyle. Charles Duhigg came to my rescue with the Power of Habits (2012), and soon after came Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
In the space of half a year, I had consumed my share of self-help books. Do I think they were useful? Yes, I absolutely believe the books played a fundamental role in improving tiny aspects of my days that consequently benefited my overall livelihood.
Whether it was avoiding screens first thing in the morning, reading every evening, stretching after exercise, or noting down goals for the week, I found myself achieving more daily.
£50 million…
I am, of course, not unique in my interest in self-help. In 2022, Nielsen Book Data found that the self-help book sector generated a whopping £50 million in sales. Social media played a huge role in that trend, and TikTok users were responsible for 30% of self-help book purchases.
The wealth of interest in self-help presents a paradox. On the one hand, it is encouraging to understand that many people feel motivated to improve their lives and fulfil their potential. On the other hand, the interest means that there are countless unsatisfied people living among us.
Where does the coin land in your opinion? Is it promising, or worrying, that so many of us are fixated on improving our existence?
Interestingly, a sociological trend has emerged in parallel with the self-help craze. Researchers Jean Twenge and David Blanchflower noted that happiness was once considered to follow a U-Shape trend, thanks to the famed mid-life crisis. But now, the experts believe the satisfaction actually rises steadily with age instead.
At the core of this shift, according to Twenge and Blanchflower, is a youth mental health crisis in 6 English speaking countries: the UK, Ireland, US, Canada, Australia and New Zealand. To no one’s surprise, the research referenced the rise of smartphones, social media, and the internet as catalysts to this trend.
Whilst the tech-related links will not have surprised you, one element did interest me. Men’s mental health has, rightly, received a lot of attention in recent years, but the study found that happiness had fallen at a more significant rate among young women.
Self-help should absolutely not be about gender. But, and perhaps it is naïve of me, I would have been pretty confident in men to come out on top of this ranking.
Why do I care?
The fact that you have found this page suggests that you share several of my core interests, and at the very least have your own personal perspective about self-improvement.
As I have previously alluded to with my reading of self-help literature, I have had a base level of interest in habits, purpose, and happiness for several years now. Across the past six months I have experienced a deepening of my interest in this subject area, during a time in which many of my previous constants come to an abrupt close.
A new job, the end of a relationship, and a change in city has left me in a position where my day to day is entirely unrecognisable to how it looked 6 months ago. As a result of these changes, I am more curious than ever to truly understand what it is that makes me tick. To do so, I must learn from others.
Maybe you have just started a full-time role for the first time, and have quickly realised that your dream office based role isn’t quite living up to your expectations. Or maybe you are a seasoned professional, burdened by an overwhelming realisation that it is years since you last stepped outside of your comfort zone. Or maybe you simply believe that now is the perfect moment to seek ‘more.’
Whatever the reason, I’m interested in hearing from you.
If you feel open to sharing your why, please find my contact details at the bottom of this page. I won’t pretend to be an expert, and I certainly won’t be able to answer all your questions! But what I can do, is talk, listen, and debate any of the subject matters that have caught your attention in this article.
FinbarMajor.com 
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